Veterans Helping Veterans: A Recovery Story
Shaun Coffey had just left military service when his father passed away unexpectedly. Shaun was in his 20s, filled with conflicting pain, and now holding a life insurance payout. He spent the money on two things: a car, and drugs. This led to addiction and more than a decade spent homeless.
Shaun was raised in a family with deep military ties. His father was in the Air Force, both his brother and sister served, as did several extended family members. It was expected of him. He enlisted in the Marine Corps at 18.
Shaun also grew up in very difficult circumstances. His mother left after the divorce from his father and didn’t resurface again until his mid 20s. He experienced extensive physical and emotional abuse from his father. “I scored 10 ACEs,” states Shaun, referring to the Adverse Childhood Experiences assessment, the leading evaluation of childhood trauma which scores on 10 trauma indicators.
“I was told I would never amount to anything,” reflects Shaun. “I’ve carried that with me my whole life.”
“They changed the way I viewed myself and my life. Without Harbor Care staff, I can’t say where I would be today.”
Shaun spent more than 10 years using substances, couch surfing, living in his car, in the woods or under local bridges. Then, he made the decision to find recovery, and managed to stick with it. Yet, he continued to struggle with homelessness.
In 2010, he became a father to a baby girl. “It was the best thing that could have happened to me.” Shaun’s road was still a long one, but this set in-motion a progression of experiences and opportunities that would change his life.
He eventually moved into a transitional housing program for families so he could provide a safe place for them both to live. Circumstances beyond his control forced Shaun out of the program and into his car, again. He reached out to the director of his program and they connected him to Harbor Care’s Veterans First program. Shaun moved into Dalianis House, a Harbor Care transitional housing apartment complex for veterans.
At Dalianis House, Shaun accessed a support team to help him realize stability and a path forward. “They changed the way I viewed myself and my life. Without Harbor Care staff, I can’t say where I would be today.”
Shaun’s case manager connected him with mental health therapy. Shaun was quite cynical of the idea at first, but the seed was planted. He now looks at therapy in a very different light and refers to his therapist as a “godsend.” “I’ve grown so much. I’ve gained such self-worth.”
Shaun soon moved into Buckingham Place, which includes family units, and is Harbor Care’s second Nashua-based transitional housing apartment complex for veterans. Now his daughter could visit and stay with him. As Shaun’s life stabilized, he took another positive step forward in his recovery. He joined, Harbor Care’s Safe Station program as a Peer Recovery Support Specialist. “It was the first job I had that I felt a sense of purpose and doing something to help people that were in a position I was once in.” Shaun also utilized a Veteran Affairs’ subsidized housing voucher to move into his own apartment, one of Harbor Care’s supportive housing units for veterans.
In 2017 Shaun took a job as a peer support coach with a Manchester-based organization, where he worked the next three years. In January, he returned to Harbor Care’s Veterans First program as a case manager directly serving residents of both Dalianis House and Buckingham Place, where he once lived himself.
Shaun also took another personal leap. He moved out of his supported housing apartment in Nashua and into his own independent place in Londonderry. His apartment in Nashua provided a level of safety that was very comforting after years of such instability. But, “I knew I needed to grow as a person, and I’ve already grown so much.”
Shaun is 20 years removed from military service, yet still feels he is honoring that commitment. His connection with the individuals he works with goes beyond their shared veteran status. “We share the common experiences of knowing what it’s like to sleep outside in the cold, to struggle to get food, our addiction, to just survive. You’re not alone here, is what I can tell them.”
Shaun is a critical part of Harbor Care’s goal to end veteran homelessness in New Hampshire, and his own personal journey and transformation are extraordinary. “It’s amazing to have people around you who care and believe in you. People who will go to bat for you, but will also use checks and balances and sort of call you out when you lose sight of your goals. But, at the end of the day, and after all the service and help is offered, it was me who needed to learn to be different.”
In addition to his full-time job, Shaun is enrolled in college and nearing graduation. He’s a Certified Recovery Support Worker and plans to get his Alcohol and Drug Counselor license. He’s also a loving father to his now 10-year old daughter, Hayden, who calls her dad a superhero for what he has overcome and what he now does to help others.
Shaun’s long-term goal is to take what he has learned from his own childhood trauma and help kids.
“It’s therapeutic for me to be able to help people. Being able to witness the moment they start believing in themselves and making decisions to better their lives has been nothing short of amazing.”
You can help end veteran homelessness in NH. Your support will provide important stability for veterans, like Shaun, and the opportunity to believe in themselves and transform their lives. Please make a gift today.